The Costco Trip

Let me say, that I hadn't been to a grocery store since early July and I only bought enough to get me through to the Ironman.  When I left to go up to Canada, my fridge was completely empty.  It had lemonade, coffee cream, and 2 pieces of bread(the ends).  My freezer was completely empty except for 1 package of sausage and a little stir-fry vegetables.

I woke up like it was Christmas morning on Saturday, August 30th in anticipation of my Costco trip.  I first stopped at Ikea since it's right next to Costco to pick up some end tables for my living room.  I decommissioned the 2 large cardboard boxes that were my current end tables.  The end tables were on sale for $7 and they look fine to me.  Sure they're not fancy antiques but I hate spending money on furniture as seen by using cardboard box tables for the last 6 months.  Ikea opened at 9am and Costco 9:30 so it was perfect.

I arrived at Costco and parked as close as I could get since I might have to make two trips to the car.  I got to the entrance and saw the palette cart.

This was going to be big enough to hold all my Costco treasure.  I made my way into the store and proceed right to the snack aisle.

I started loading up the cart with just about everything.  I got a 30 pack of candy bars, cereal bars, CheezIts, Club crackers, slim jims, jerky, M&Ms, peanuts, cashews, dry roasted almonds, and pistachios.  It was heaven.

Finally the time had arrived, the chip aisle.  I started grabbing every type of chip.  I got Kettle lightly salted(not that good), Ruffles, Tostitos, and even a big bag of the Veggie Stix which are sortof healthy. I bought a big thing of Utz pretzel sticks.  As I continued with glee, I started to get a bad feeling I had gone once through the aisle and for the love of god and all things that are holy NO DORITOS.  Again NO DORITOS.  I panicked but then I remember that in a previous visit they had some chips in the back aisles by the bread.  I'll just keep going and I'm sure they're just in a different spot.

I continued going through each aisle and grabbing stuff, peanut butter, soup, salsa, etc when I made it to the cold food section.  This would be last so now was the time to start the Dorito hunt.

I went to the bread aisle where there were some chips in a previous visit nothing.  I wheeled my palette cart through more aisles still nothing.  OH MY GOD!!  This can't be happening...breathe.  Maybe I just missed them in the chip/snack aisles in all my joy at the beginning like when your opening gifts Xmas morning and totally miss the big one tucked way behind the tree.

I went slowly up and down the chip/snack aisles and still nothing.  No way, what the hell!  Slow down, try one more time.  Still nothing and then I almost cursed Costco for not having them but I came to my senses instead I wept a little and my soul died a little inside. I guess I'll be going to the grocery store right after I unload the Escape when I get home.

I made my way back to the cold food section and started rummaging through the coolers grabbing tons of food.  I got chicken, lasagna, tortellinis, ice cream sandwiches, etc.  The cart was almost overloaded and starting to get really hard to push.  At the time, my legs were still sore.

I had made my way through the entire store and here's the final cart pictures:

Phew I didn't need to make two trips, it all fit..barely.  I made my way to a check out aisle.  Usually at Costco you get little help with your food.  They basically just scan it and put it back into the cart.  This time a helper wheeled a new palette cart with boxes on it and actually put all the food into the boxes.  It was nice.  The final tally on check out was $450 spent.

I loaded up the Escape as it barely fit and drove home.  I unloaded all the food which took awhile especially going up the 3 flights of stairs to my condo.  Threw all the cold stuff in the freezer and refrigerator and drove over to my local grocery store for my Doritos.  I got 2 bags of Doritos and also noticed Cheetos Puffs and grabbed 2 of those as well.

In my haste to get back home, I backed into a car pulling out of my parking spot.  The car was totally in my blind spot as I was backing out.  I was going pretty slow but still dented his front fender.  Oh joy!  I have no idea how much my next premiums will go up or not.  I guess we'll see.  No one was hurt and my car didn't have a scratch.

It's been 5 days since the Costco and chip run.  I completed 1 and 3/4 bags of Doritos, 1 bag of Cheetos, 1 bag of beef jerky, 1 Costco Lasagna(w/ some help from Elena) and quite a few ice cream sandwiches.  I still have unopened snacks but that's okay hopefully they'll last me for awhile.

Ironman Left Over Photos

Here's the rest of the photos they took that I haven't posted well because all the photos of the run are horrible except the one that I'm using for my new profile picture.  I wish the photo folks would've had placards about 20 meters before their photographers basically telling us they were there.  I mean I'm all for seeing the "true" ironman experience, suffering but a nice run and bike photo would've been cool.

The picture website got a little smarter about hiding they're larger photos but I was still able to grab them for your viewing pleasure.  They are in order that they were taken as you can see by the last run picture this was right about with 600 meters or so to go and I'm suffering like a dog.

 

 

 

  

 

Ironman Race Report: Post Race

Post Race:
I made my way out of the portapotty and it was quite cold and wet.  I decided it time to find my dry clothes bag and get moving.  Well moving is relative since I could barely walk.  It took me about 5 minutes to cross the street over to the transition area.  I got my clothes and went one last time into the changing tent to sit down out of the rain and put on my dry clothes.  There were a few people in there staying out of the rain.

I realized that I never talked to Amber or Joe about the "finish procedure".  They didn't know where the finish area was or how it worked.  Wandering around the finish bleachers after race wouldn't be so bad except I could barely walk and I had all my gears bags plus bike.

It was if I was hallucinating because I just happened to see Joe outside the transition fence.  He came to look for me.  It was just chance that he was there when I was coming out of the change tent.  Awesome!!  I handed over all my gears bags over the fence and he told me to meet them behind the bleachers.

I grabbed my bike and waited in the exit line as they checked your bike number with your bracelet number.  Since the bike exit was behind the finish chute and Amber, Joe and Elena were by the finish chute area I had to walk probably a half mile just to get to them.  It wasn't so bad as I was using my bike as a make-shift walker to help shuffle along.

I met them and we proceeded to walk back to the hotel which was over a mile away.  I don't remember much of the trip but I somehow made it to the hotel and thanked god for an elevator to the 3rd floor.  I wasn't hungry and they had eaten concession type food already.  I just kindof sat and removed my shoes to reveal each toenail had a blister under it and the massive blood blister on my toe from being stepped on.

I barely was able to get into the shower because my legs were throbbing.  I would lose a footrace with a 90+ year old man who uses a walker.  I just lay on the bed and I couldn't sleep because just sitting there the legs hurt.  They definitely felt like they had completed the Ironman.  I was in way worse shape than after any of my 3 marathons.

Here's some stats from the event.  I was 95th in my age group for the swim out of 315 people.  Not bad, I was still 95th out of 315 in my age group after the bike.  Hilarious, I didn't lose any spots or gain any.  I ended up 30th in my age group and 120th overall.  I passed 65 people in my age group alone on the run.  That's crazy thinking about it.  My first half of marathon was 1:39 and the final half was 1:45.  That's not too bad when I think about it but I'm guessing my first 10k was way faster than the last 3.  The first 42 miles of the bike I averaged 19.3(headwind and only one hill) and the last 70 I averaged 20.1(the two massive climbs).  Pretty amazing on that also I was 370 something overall after bike so in all I passed over 150 people on the run.  I did run a 3:25 but it was only good for 52nd overall run time.  I was hoping for top 25 so I was bummed about that.  I ended up with the 11th fastest in my age group.

As I was flying back home and thinking about writing this report, I started to think about the funny things Ironman athletes do and experience and I immediately thought you know it makes us seem like mental patients to a normal person.  So here's my top 10 reasons why Ironman athletes are similar to mental hospital patients.

    10. Obsess about little things.
     9. Strict diets(on course nutrition) and medication(e-caps).
     8. Volunteers/nurses all wear surgical gloves.
     7. Simple pleasures make them happy(post-race cheeseburger).
     6. Basically live in their own little world and ignore everyone else.
     5. Both wear funny clothes so you can pick them out of crowd.
     4. They both talk to themselves.
     3. They never want to go to a doctor.
     2. It's normal to pee yourself.
     And the number 1 reason Ironman athletes are similar to mental patients...
        They think they're normal but everyone else knows they're CRAZY!

I did my best but maybe I should've left it at a top 5.  So I'm not the funniest Ironman in the world, but it's better than nothing.

Tomorrow, I'll go into great detail about the infamous Costco trip and all the junk food I've been consuming since the race.  Let's just say I've downed 2 bags of Doritos and 1 bag of Cheetos since the race.

Ironman Race Report: T2 & the Marathon

T2:
As I rolled around the last corner on the bike course I had my shoes already undone, I pulled my feet out for the easy shoeless dismount.  I had practiced this procedure about a bazillion times in my training at home so it went smoothly.  I handed my bike to an official bike catcher volunteer.  I did this volunteer job last year when I signed up.  It went smoothly.  I started slowly jogging to my gear bag.  I had my helmet off as I reached down for my gear bag.  I made my way into the change tent and it was empty.  I actually had a volunteer to help sort stuff out.  It was cool.  He just said throw everything on the ground and take what I want.  I put my hat on and my shoes.  I grabbed my gels.  I almost wish I would've changed into a fresh pair of socks because I would've saw this massive garbonzo bean sized blood blister on my left toe where I was stepped on.

I looked at my watch as I was killing the the T2 time, it read just past 1 minute.  I did have to hit the bathroom since I didn't let loose into the spectators on the way into town.  My final T2 time was over 2:30.  I went through this line of volunteers on the way out who were handing out gels, sunscreening people, water, and gatorade.  Definitely nice although my tank was topped off and I didn't need or do sunscreen.

The Marathon:
So I started to last part of the Ironman journey, my strength and I was still ahead of my goal pace.  If I rock this marathon, I have a shot at Kona which I thought based on previous results I needed around a 10:10 total to get.  I didn't know that the conditions and possible massive draft pack I heard about was making this the fastest IMC for my age group.  The top 20 in my age group were all under 10 hours and the last Kona slot went to a 9:53.

I started running and was trying my best to go real "EASY".  I actually focused on this but it still didn't help that much.  I did blow by all the fast downhillers that I was leapfrogging on the bike about a half mile into the marathon.  I thought evil thoughts which basically amounted take that you fast bike split guys.  HA!

I got the first mile and it was 6:33.  OH SHIT!!  Okay time to slow down even more, just relax.  I saw my support crew, waved and smiled as it was still easy.  I missed the 2 mile mark but did start taking in gatorade at the aid stations.  I clicked at mile 3 and saw 13:50.  Well that's a little better but still not my pace.  Finally at mile 4 I saw 7:10.  Okay, this is the pace just hold this.

After mile 4, we start to head out of town and it hits.  My stomach/side just starts to hurt.  Crap!  Like I need this for another 22 miles, I've run through side aches a couple of times.  It's not fun but it can be done.  I definitely don't want to add that on top of the typical marathon wall which I was expecting at mile 18.  I started to look for an open portapotty to see if I could release some inner demons.

As I was looking I definitely started getting hammered by the headwind, I knew this would slow me down which would be good on the way out because we'd get that nice tailwind during the 2nd part.  I just tried stay relaxed but I could see with each mile the headwind was turning my 7:15 effort into 7:45s.  I found a portapotty and left my stomach/side ache and came out refreshed.  I busted out a nice mile after that and was feeling pretty.

I just kept passing people as I made my way to the turnaround.  The headwind was brutal in the open areas and I was using the people I was passing for a little draft and then it happened.  I didn't notice til mile 14 but looking back on it about mile 12 the headwind just sortof disappeared and the clouds had come over which cooled it down a bit.

I got to the turnaround, half-way and grabbed my special needs bag.  I loaded the gels into my pockets and started drinking my cytomax.  It was nice to have easy access to some liquid but still a pain to be carrying it.  I felt good and started to pick up the effort.  I put in a nice 7:40 mile to 14.

This is where I noticed that the tailwind was non-existent.  Basically, Mother Nature was like Kathy Bates in Misery where it starts out all nice(tailwind on the bike), then ties you up(headwind on the first half of the run), and finally she's got the sledgehammer and you have a 4x4 between your ankles.  No friggin tailwind!!  Are you serious?!?!  I was cursing furiously out loud.

On top of no tailwind, I hit the Ironman WALL.  Mile 14 and the wall, WTF!  My legs were just completely in pain.  Each step was muscle pain in both quads and both calves.  Oh hell, I have to mentally suffer for 12 more miles.  I had prepared for the wall at mile 18.  Crap 4 miles too early.  Before all my running injuries, I would've just pushed through this as best as possible.  Now, I was worried that pushing through this stuff could cause a hamstring problem or something else.  There was no way I wasn't finishing this f-in Ironman.  So instead I went to just getting to the next mile.  Just moving forward and in my head my Kona hopes went POOF!

I was clicking 8:10 somethings and even saw a couple of 8:20s and the 8:37 mile with the last big uphill in it.  During these miles, I had a couple of guys who were passing me between aid stations and who I was passing when they stopped to walk the aid stations.  Oh well, they weren't in my age group so no biggie.

I got to mile 22 and decided to really look close at my overall time.  It read 9:46.  Can I run 7:30s to meet that 10:15 time goal?  My legs hurt like hell but 30 something minutes isn't that much left.  Still no tailwind...and then it started to rain.  Fucking great!!  After the initial pissed off moment came and went, I was thankful that I wasn't on the Yellow Lake descent.

I started to push as best I could and left my co-runners and then I felt it.  A tailwind on Main Street...sweet or at least I saw the flag blowing a little bit in my direction.  I passed McDonalds and said yep I'm going there sometime soon after this F-IN thing is over with.  I looked up the road and saw a couple of runners way off in the distance.  I figured why not try to catch them.

I pushed as best as I could but I could only manage just over 8 minute miles at this point.  Lame!  I was trying to get free energy from the crowd but it really didn't work.  The wall had been wearing on me for over an hour and I'm a wimp.

I got to mile 25 and was thinking yes I'm going to finish this F-IN thing.  Okay, let's gut it out some more.  We started the out-n-back section.  About 50 meters from the 25 mile mark is the finish line but you must turn the opposite direction and complete just over a mile of out-n-back.  The funny thing is I didn't hear the announcer when I turned maybe by luck no one was finishing around that time or I was just oblivious to it.

As I started the out-n-back, I saw a group of 4 runners.  One guy was in my age group so I decided to go by the group at a quick pace so he would have no chance of latching on.  I thought to myself each place counts because who knows maybe I still have a super longshot.

You can see people coming towards on their way to the finish and I didn't see anyone else in my age group so I just kept the pace the best I could.  I turned and looked down the big long road to the finish.  There was only one person and he was way ahead.  Cool I thought, I'll just cruise it in and enjoy the moment.  Right then I got passed by a guy who said to me, "Let's go!".  I was like WTH!  I immediately looked at his calf, "42".  Cool so I let him go a little bit but did pick up just a tad to use his energy to get me to the line.

One of the single biggest moments of my Ironman happened, another guy came by going a good pace but his calf had a "37".  OH NO YOU DIDN'T!!  I immediately reacted.  I was holding pace just right behind him and the other guy.  We were within 200 meters of the finish line and I made my move.  I put the hammer down with everything I could muster.  Again if I went early enough and fast enough he wouldn't have a chance to react even if he was feeling better than me.  I have no idea where I got the energy from but I was in a full sprint when I went by.  It's hard to relate how fast it was because of all the 8 minute miles but it was easily sub 6 pace if not closer to 5 minute mile pace.  It was only from 200 yards but I was unstoppable.

There was no reaction or attempt as I flew by.  They had the "tape" at the finish line ready and I through up my arms as I crossed for the finish line picture.  I was finished with the clock reading 10:20:something.  I didn't hear anything during the finish area.  I didn't even notice the crowd with my sprint finish.  I later heard from Amber that they did announce, "Alan Sherman you are an Ironman!" but I didn't hear it. I didn't hear Elena, Amber and Joe cheering like mad, nothing. This one guy changed my entire Ironman finish.  It was almost if I hadn't done the Ironman.  I got my finishing times with their new timing system and found out that one place was worth 30th overall in my age group.  Oh HELL!!  I was so upset that I wasn't even close.  I did run a 3:25 marathon split which considering how I felt for the last 12 miles wasn't bad at all.

I had two people grab me at the finish line which was cool as I really didn't have think at all.  They asked if I wanted to go to medical, I said nah...my legs hurt like hell but that's about it.  As usual, I didn't feel like eating anything so I just drank a PowerBar recovery shake but that didn't sit to well so I made my way to the portapotty.   It was raining pretty good by then so once I sat in the portapotty I didnt' want to leave.  It was warm, dry and I was sitting down.  My fortress of solitude!

Tomorrow, I'll talk about my post race thoughts and I'll give my Top 10 Ways Ironman atheletes and mental hospital patients are similar...

Ironman Race Report: T1 & Bike

T1:

I came into T1 super excited and started dreaming about Kona.  I just gained 7 minutes on my goal time and if things continued to go well I'd have a shot or so I thought.  I had my wetsuit in my arm and went to navigate the massive rows of transition bags.  Here's a picture of the area in the morning:

 

I found my bag and grabbed it.  I immediately took out my aero helmet and put it on as I was navigating my way to the change tent.  The change tent was a happening place.  I immediately saw "crack" and other ungodly horrors.  It was crowded but I found a seat.  I opened the rest of my bag and started to go through my routine.  Jersey on, stuff my wetsuit in the bag and ignore arm warmers, knee warmers and vest.  I looked at my feet and they weren't cover in sand so I just started to dry them off.  I put on my right sock and shoe first when it happened.  The guy next to me stepped on my left foot with his cleat.  I yelped like a puppy and he said sorry.  So here's my key T1 advice when you sit on the chair stay small.  Its kindof like swimming in the mass start.  You want to be as small as possible to get through.  This foot stomp would cause me pain throughout the bike and run even though I didn't know until the end why my foot hurt.  Again, totally forgetting stuff and more Alzheimer moments.

I finished my routine and I was off.  I dropped off my bag in this massive pile on the way out of the change tent.  I went out the back side of the bike racks since my rack was closer that way.  I grabbed my bike off the rack and proceeded to jog.  I was passing people who were just chatting and walking their bikes to the mount area.  I thought good for me as that's one more place.

I got to the mount area and proceeded to do my running mount.  For some reason, I was more tired than usual and I about fell.  No problem as it wasn't too congested so I just went from there.  I had my cleat covers on which was allowing me to jog on the pavement without fear of falling and I didn't have to clip when I started pedaling.  I got around the corner and when things opened up a little I removed each cleat cover and clipped in.  I was off...

Bike:

The bike was going to be perfect because it's a simple ellipse like course and we had a slight headwind going south but the wind would continue to get stronger and turn into a raging tailwind heading home north.  All the major climbs, we would have a nice tailwind.  This would really keep the legs fresh and the mind fresh as well.  Mother Nature was so nice.

I knew I was early and probably wouldn't see my support crew.  I didn't but it didn't matter too much as I would see them on the run where it was easier to wave and smile.  I settled into my pace and was dodging slower bikes and staying out of the way of the speed demons.  I didn't even look at my speed at all for the first miles.  I just went easy.

I started to drink water as per my nutrition plan for the bike.  After about 10 minutes on the bike I had to piss really bad.  I kept looking early on for an open portapotty but no luck.  Crap!  Not only that but my left foot's toe was really hurting.  It was like I had accidentally put a roll in my sock when I put it on in T1.  It was weird because I've never had any toe issues with my cycling shoes.  I never made that T1 foot stomp connection until after the entire Ironman was done.  Wild! I kept going and soon I was at the first little steep hill by mile 10.  My legs still didn't feel warmed up yet so I just went up the best I could but still passed about 20 people.

Since my swim was farther towards the front I was able to go down the hill after this at full speed without much trouble.  It wasn't crowded so I was quite happy.  I made my way back to the main flat road and started to take in nutrition.  I still had to piss really bad and still no portapotties open so I made an executive decision, piss like a competitive triathlete...on the bike without stopping.

I had a full bottle of water to wash off afterwards but I needed to find a spot where there was no one behind me.  Finally I was all by myself and I let it fly well not exactly.  I had to really focus to get it going since I had never practiced peeing on the bike.  I felt better and squirted the water on myself to wash it off.  I probably just would've waited in a portapotty line had I not had such a fast swim.  Every minute was going to count so I was going to do what I had to see if I could make Kona.

I kept a nice easy pace and then I saw Jeff.  We exchanged swim times.  He did a sub 1 hour swim which was awesome and he was shocked when I told him I did a 68.  I kept going but still had to piss again.  Overall I think I peed 6 times on the bike.  It just wasn't warm enough out on the course and I was doing mostly liquid nutrition.

The best advice that I got was just roll with what your stomach does regarding nutrition.  This was great advice because I started to feel bloated at certain points so I'd just go with water for a bit and then when my stomach would feel better I'd go back to my Infinit.  I was all over the map with my nutrition.

We arrived at the first milestone of the day Richter Pass. You can see it in the background.

There's a tight right hand corner heading to the start of the hill.  I tried to take this as fast as possible to carry as much "free" speed into the climb.  I was fully warmed up and felt good at the start.  I was cruising up the first part laying waste to the cyclists around me.

I was still trying to stay within myself but push just a little.  I was flying compared to everyone else on the climb.

 

I never got passed on the uphill sections.  I remembered the climb from riding the course last year.  I was going up the last of 3 segments when I saw Miranda.  I said hello but I was surprised to see her.  I was worried but didn't really get a chance to find out what was happening with her race.  As I read on her blog, she was having major stomach issues but still managed to wish me well.  Definitely world class!

I started the decent and people who I had just passed were zooming by me.  I was aero and going as fast I could but that's my weakness because I'm so light.  The rollers started and I'd pass people going up but they'd pass me back going down.  This is where I was passed by one guy on the uphill.  I was shocked!  My pride was hurt a little as he pulled away from me a bit on the downhill as well.  He slowed for an aid station and I zoomed by him but I really don't remember if he passed me again or not.

On the one of the last rollers, I saw Don's murdered out black Beyond with full on 808s.  The entire bike is black and sweet looking.  He looked good and we exchanged a quick keep going kindof cheer.  The rollers were finished and it would be flat for about 25-30 miles before the final climb at Yellow Lake.  This is where I was being passed every so often as I just maintained my pacing and effort.

We started what was the worst part of the course mentally for me.  It's an out-n-back section where you head south for a ways and then back.  This meant into a headwind plus the road is really crappy.  At the end of this section is the bike special needs aid station.  It seemed to take forever to get to the turnaround at special needs.  It was draining mentally but I just tried my best to keep going at my pace.

I got to the special needs and they handed me my bag.  I had a bottle of Infinit, couple of gels and bottle of Cytomax in it.  I had only consumed 3 bottles of Infinit up to this point because of my tummy troubles.  I decided to stop after the aid station with other cyclists to sort everything so I wouldn't crash.  I dumped my left over concentrated infinit bottle and loaded my cages.  I also tossed a partially eaten clif bar and put the gels in my pocket.

I was off and I grabbed some sips of Cytomax.  Ahh pure heaven.  It was sweet but just something a little different.  Things started to pick up as we had the tailwind again and I was feeling better.  I started to really up the tempo a bit.  I wanted to get back to the main road and Yellow Lake.

I made the turn onto the main road and new things were going well.  I started to push all the gradual ups and really pass people like they were standing still.  Although there were some gradual downs as well and they'd pass me back.  I was probably a mile or two before the Yellow Lake climb when I felt a twinge in my bad hamstring.  Oh no you didn't!!  I immediately shifted down and down as much water as I could.

I made a conscious decision to forgo the climbing glory at Yellow lake and just spin easy up the climb.  Yellow lake is special because there are ton of spectators who line both sides of the road.  It's almost like the Tour and even a few fans run along side you for a bit.  Definitely crazy but I wouldn't be able to drop the hammer like I wanted to because if my hamstring tied up I wouldn't have any chance at Kona and might not even finish the marathon.

I still never got passed going up the climb at Yellow Lake.  It's steeper than Richter but shorter overall.  I passed a ton of people even though I was really going easy.  I left the few folks who I had been playing leap frog with on the rollers leading up to this climb.  Overall it was mayhem with spectators just going crazy.

Once you get to the top of Yellow Lake, its basically downhill all the way to finish and you have less than 30 miles.  I kept thinking about the marathon that loomed ahead but I ride 30 miles during lunch time.  I was so totally about to be done with the bike of Ironman.  I was getting pretty excited.

The first major downhill starts and it was a straight shot.  I checked the wind and it was still behind us so I went full aero.  I was flying past bigger fellows who were on the bullhorns rather than aero bars.  I was stoked.  I was actually picking up time on a few bigger folks on a descent.

The last major downhill has some curves in it and with that it had some serious crosswinds.  I was getting blown around so I stayed up on the bullhorns but tried to tuck as best as I could.  It was towards the end of this section that I got past by a lady who was just flying. More credit to her for being fearless.

Then I saw it, the 100 mile sign...only 12 more miles til I get to start my marathon which I felt I was going to crush.  My legs still felt great and mentally I wanted to be off the bike but I really didn't have any butt issues which was great.  Desoto shorts were rocking that.  As we were heading into town I got passed again by a couple of my leap frog buddies.  I basically told myself they were going down on the run.

Just as I got into town, I had to piss again.  Argh!! Should I go on the bike one last time with the potential of having a few spectators see it or wait til T2?  There were so many spectators lining the streets through town there just wasn't anyway I'd not be seen pissing.  I decided to go in T2 the precious minutes were not worth embarrassing the event by pissing on the bike in town.  It's definitely not what the spectators woke up that morning, braved the heat and wind to see.

We hit Main street again and had this massive tailwind.  Cyclists were zooming by me like I was standing still.  I was still doing my pace and found comfort that they would all go down in the run.  I'd be the one zooming past them once we started my event.

Stay tuned for the next installment, T2 and the marathon.  You'll find out that every place does matter and see how Mother Nature was really Kathy Bates from Misery.

On a side blog note, I just got back from Costco where I absolutely destroyed it.  The only thing which brought tears to my eyes was they didn't have Doritos.  I was shocked and wept right in the chip aisle.  The one bag of chips and they don't have it.  I'll be going to the normal store right after I finish posting to get my Doritos.  I'll have some pictures and movies tomorrow but here's a few stats.  I was able to get it all onto one of the palette carts but just barely.  I spent $450 and Costco record I'm sure for a family of 1.  I ran out of room in my freezer.

Ironman Race Report: The Infamous Swim

If you've read a few posts, I usually blog about at least once a week about how I suck in the water.  I swim about as well as a ROCK.  Leading up to the race, I was just worried about the swim.  I knew I could complete the distance as I've done it in the pool quite a few times but I just wanted it to be over.

As I left you, I was standing in the water 3rd row back and basically peeing my wetsuit every 5 minutes waiting for the race to start.  The song Bitter Sweet Symphony by the Verve was playing. I was like that's weird no Beautiful Day by U2 or Ironman by Black Sabbath. Now here was the first of many Alzheimer moments for me, I don't remember the announcer saying 30 seconds to go even though I saw video that he did warn us that the cannon was about to go off.  I guess during the event there really isn't much blood feeding the brain.

The cannon went off, I clicked my watch and the swim plus Ironman started.  I took off like I was a 50 minute swimmer ie. damn fast for the first couple of minutes.  It was pandemonium as there were over 2200 people starting at the same time.  It wasn't so bad where I was as I was a good 100 yards left of the buoy line where the water polo, rugby, and football players are swimming.  I got thumped a couple of times here and there. I also whapped a couple of legs, arms and bodies.  In about 5 or so minutes, it was pretty clear.  I sighted on the houseboat.  In the swim at Canada, they use massive houseboats for each of the 2 turns instead of buoys.  This was great as I could sight from way left and not have to worry.

The swim is a triangle with the first segment/side being about 1600 meters which is not quite halfway.  I just kept cruising with the mass of humanity churning water to my right.  Every so often I decided to move to the school of fish swimming and every time I went right back out to the left.  The draft in the mix of hundreds of swimmers might have saved me some energy but I just couldn't keep my rhythm.

I had no one really around me as I was swimming and was just going an easy pace.  It didn't seem to take so long to get the first houseboat.  As we approached, I could see the bottom of the lake again.  The water is pretty clear up there in Canada and the turn is pretty close to another shoreline so this was a great sign.  I just need to make it to houseboat #2 and I'd be over halfway...with the SWIM.

The turn was uneventful for me as I was still left of the swim pack.  I was using the swimmers on the edge as sighting help since I swim about as straight as a sidewinder rattlesnake.  The top part of the triangle is only 400 meters so that last houseboat came up pretty fast.

Sweet I'm over halfway, this rocks.  I'll be done with this swim and be able to really start the Ironman.  I started to think about not having to swim again in like FOREVER and a great joy came over me.  I decided to lets just hammer this last part of the swim to be done with it.

I started really pushing, focusing and going as fast as I could.  As I was doing this I was got a little to close to the swim pack and got clocked in the eye by a lady swimmer.  It was if Hilary Swank from Million Dollar Baby had punched me. My goggles stayed on but man did my eye hurt.  It felt like it was bleeding.  I started to wonder if they had a cut-man in T1 to patch up such injuries.  A black eye in my finisher picture should be a keeper.  Hopefully, it doesn't swell shut on the bike.  Okay, so yes I over-react to everything as there wasn't even a mark afterwards.

I continued to really push and I'd sight every so often.  The weird thing was I really didn't see a huge pack of swimmers up in front of me.  I was wondering if I was really up with a decent group.  This got me even more excited and I tried to keep up the good pace.  I swear I was passing a ton of people here but it's hard to tell.

I started to see the bottom again and sighted on last time to make sure I was headed towards the finish.  This is where I thought I had rocked the swim.  I didn't see this massive crowd of people running up the beach.  I saw just a few people slowly walking through the water which scared me a little since I didn't want to run into a water walker.  I was swimming until my hand hit dirt or about a foot of water.

My hand hit dirt.  I stood and didn't feel dizzy at all.  During each open water practice swim in the week, I had always practically fallen over like a drunken frat guy on exiting the water.  Sweet...so I started moving a little faster out onto the beach.  I pulled unzipped my wetsuit in a second, pulled down the top part of my wetsuit, removed my cap and goggles and then....

I clicked the split on my watch and saw it. 1:08 something...I practically jumped in the air.  I had a shot still at Kona and plus I would be able to get a wetsuit stripper since it wasn't this massive crowd.  After thinking about it, I feel even better because I probably swam a little longer course since I stayed left the entire way around the course.

Here's the pictures that were taken.  You can see I'm pulling down my wetsuit in preparation for the strippers and I look like...well..hell.

Tomorrow, I'll give out the best T1 advice and talk about trying to save time on the bike. Plus tomorrow is the big Costco trip..it will go down as the biggest Costco trip ever.  I'm going to take some video and pictures of the special occasion.  Instead of trying to navigate 2 carts through the aisles and Labor Day weekend Costco shoppers, I'll fill the cart with dry foods first, checkout and then come back for the 2nd run at all the cold food, etc.

Ironman Race Report: Race Morning

I would like to say I was nervous and excited like Xmas morning, but I was calm like a serial killer.  I guess being nervous and excited for the past year of training leaves the tank empty.  This was a blessing as I was able to consume 2 Clif Bars, water and some Infinit because I had no butterflies.

Part of my type A routine required me to check the weather from 3 sources.  If I was in an ice age, I'd check the weather to see if it was going to snow and if the high was going to be 10 or 15 degrees below.  All 3 sources agreed that rain was coming in the late afternoon, mid 70s til then with a south wind.  If all the athletes heard this my lone groan of disappointment would've been drowned out by hoots, hollers and celebratory high fives.  This was a serious blow to my slimest of slim Kona chances.  The only bright spot was it wasn't suppose to rain during my bike.

I spent the next 10 minutes applying body glide everywhere.  I applied from my heel up my entire calf to ease wetsuit removal in case I had to remove my wetsuit without the help of the wetsuit stripper volunteers.  I painted a body glide turtleneck to prevent wetsuit strawberries and hickies.  It gave me a couple of hickies/strawberries in my race week open water practice swims.  I love my wetsuit but I don't want to show everyone that we have that "type of relationship".

My support crew(Amber, Elena and Joe) and I left at 4:30AM to head over to the start area.  They grabbed spots for viewing the swim start while I went through the simple motions.  Dropped off special needs bags, loaded the bike with nutrition and left a deposit at the portapotty or as I would call it later, The Fortress of Solitude.

I did a quick bike/run/swim exit walkthrough and spotted Miranda Aldritt in the tire inflation line.  I rode the bike course with her last year after she had posted on Slowtwitch.  I can't say enough about how cool the Slowtwitch community is.  Between last year and now, she became a pro and placed 7th at Ironman Coeur d'Alene.  We wished each other luck and planned to look for each other on the run out-n-back.

I hung out just relaxing and waiting to put on my wetsuit.  Again this was quite strange for me as before a major race, I'm about as calm and relaxed as a meth addict needing their next fix.  I had to piss again so I got in line.

I was just a couple of folks behin Jonathan Caron, 2nd place overall last year.  Amazing even pros have to wait in the portapotty lines like the rest of us.  I always thought they had special VIP portapotties which were freshly cleaned, smelled like potpourris, had Ultra Charmin toilet paper, and had a staunch British man had you a towel to dry your hands.

It was time to don the wetsuit.  Other people started putting theirs on so I didn't have to be the first but I followed like a good lemming. I walked over to the swim start entrance as they wouldn't let us on the beach til 6:30am to warmup.  I ran into Jeff as he wanted to actually warmup before the race.  He's a sub 60 swimmer so I guess a warmup wouldn't slow him down.  I just wanted to get all the way over to left of the start line without having to navigate hundreds of people.

As we stood there, I had to piss yet again.  Jeff also had to piss.  We both made like homeless people and just let her go.  Perfect, my wetsuit is officially broken in for the race.  I was warm and my foot was wet.  They opened the swim start and we wished each other luck.  He made his way to the buoy with the fast guys and I made my way out to the far left with the slow I don't want to get beat down by hundreds of swimmer folks.

I saw my support crew and handed them my backpack.  They were right above where I was going to start with the video camera ready to go.  I went to the front and took a 15 second swim to test the goggles and just get a feel for the water on my face.  It wasn't very cold so I was ready.  As I was waiting for the start, I pissed 4 more times.  I finally realized who was nervous, my 2nd in command.